Here is my beautiful little monkey, Abbie. Out of all four children, she has definitely taught me more than any of the others. Maybe it’s just because I’m listening more now… Regardless, this morning’s events made me want to take a brief moment to share with you what I learned from her about my own need to focus on being with God.
This morning, I woke up in a not-so-good mood. I was overcome with negative talk and memories of past mistakes. I was so overwhelmed in fact, tears came flowing freely down my face. About that time, I heard this little one fussing in her bed. I picked her up and her face became so full of joy!
Mumbling at having to get up before the alarm went off, I moseyed back to my bed with the baby. On the way she was giggling, laughing, and making silly noises. Still, I found it annoying. “Why can’t you just go to sleep!?” I heard myself say. I didn’t want happiness, or silliness. I just wanted to have my pity party in peace.
Then Something changed.
I can’t explain what it was other than that still small voice of my Lord and Savior. “She’s happy because she’s with you.” Those words echoed around and around in my mind. At first, I tried to dismiss it. I mean, after all the mistakes I had made, how could anyone be happy being with me?
Then I looked into those eyes. She looked back into mine and smiled. I smiled back. Her grin got larger and then she erupted into pure happiness. She began bouncing up and down and laughing with glee.
Then slowly her hand brushed the tears still coming down my cheeks and she grew still. Leaning against me, she sighed peacefully for a moment, then looked back into my eyes and smiled. “She’s just happy to be with you.” That voice again. “Why can’t you be happy too?”
Talk about a mic drop. Wow. I took a deep breath and began some inward reflection. I sure do have some amazing things to be happy about. I have a great husband, four amazing kids, and loving and kind parents. I own my own home, two vehicles, a dog, a bearded dragon. I have food to eat each and every day (maybe a bit too much food). I serve the God who created Heaven and Earth. Why can’t I be happy?
Her Focus Was On Just Being With Mom
Looking into my baby girl’s eyes that day, I realized something. She wasn’t looking around at all the things in my room that she couldn’t have. She wasn’t comparing her mommy to others. She wasn’t looking at the mess. She wasn’t looking back to yesterday. She wasn’t worried about tomorrow.
She was looking at one thing, and one thing only. She was looking at me. In that moment, despite everything going on, I was her focus. I was her world. Not my mistakes. Not my plans. Just me. And in that moment, I knew… I can’t be happy because I’m looking at too many things rather than on just being with Him.
I wonder how much beauty and how much joy I have missed out on because of being preoccupied? I wonder how often God himself has smiled on me, but I haven’t even allowed myself to see it? How many happy moments have I neglected to see because I’m looking at too much?
The Decision to Focus on Being With God
So today I made a decision that I hope you will take upon yourself as well. For today, and I hope a very long time, here are a few of my goals to help me reclaim my smile. Starting today I will endeavor to….
- Slow down.
- Look at what’s right in front of me.
- See the beauty in my family.
- Enjoy being in the presence of my God.
- Focus on one thing at a time.
If you have been struggling lately, ask yourself: Where is my focus? Is it on things that will help me to overcome my problems? Or is it on things that will simply worsen them? If you are a Christian (and I pray that if you’re not, you will consider trusting Christ as you’re Savior), remember, God is your Father!
HE wants for you to smile up at HIM just as a little child looks at their parent. I encourage you to leave the problems if just for a few minutes, and just look to HIM. See how good HE is, and I’ll bet you’ll be smiling too.